Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Sweet Valley High

I'm embarking on a new voyage; an expedition of uncharted territory. One that will involve trials and tribulations. A journey that will test my strengths and wit and most assuredly leave me with more than just a few bumps and bruises. This pilgrimage that I must travel and through which I must endure is arduous, exhausting and requires mental toughness. Many have attempted and failed...many have attempted and conquered. Stories of this adventure are mostly told through furrowed brow, nearly broken spirits, and many tears. But it is also an experience from which legends are made. My personal journey has only just begun...and I fear the worst lies ahead. And I'm scared out of my mind.

This venture over which I must the teen years! I know. Even the  mention of it causes many to cringe...either out of fear or trauma. My oldest has only just breached the tip of the teenage-iceberg, but I fear that he will not be spared from it's sickness. Yes...the eye-roll has been known to surface on occasion after I have declared my authority. And that audacious, smarter-than-you tone of voice rears its ugly head more often than not! What's most confusing is the onset of multiple personalities that seems to accompany this right of passage. Nary a mother has been left beaten, scarred, and rambling incoherently after they've suffered an encounter with this overpowering, impractical species!

I once thought I was the chosen one and would be spared this cursed excursion. Thinking I could out smart hormones, peer groups, and the urge to defy your maker that seems to trademark this age group, I have been left cowering in the corner both frightened and confused. Alas, having been proven wrong I am now left licking my wounds with my tail tucked between my legs as fate laughs at my once cocky demeanor.

No, no one is exempt even though many, like myself, have proclaimed their superiority over this inevitable phase. I can only cling to the hope that in order to build me up.....they must first break me down!!


K said...

I swear, they get worse every year too! My 16yo sister pulls crap and I ask my mom "I was never THAT bad, was I?" She replies that if I had been, I wouldn't have lived.

What makes it worse is that Miss a idolizes her I get a lot of that eye-rolling, hair-flipping snarky mouth attitude at SIX. I nip that crap in the bud immediately of course.

You'll make it through...heck, if our parents could, we can. :)

Slidecutter said...

When prayer fails, start drinking; that's all I can say about those dreaded teen years....ackkkkk!

My Granddaughter, Emma, has been doing that eye-roll since she was 3; it's a girly-thing and it's gotten worse now that she's almost 12. She's an absolutely exquisite child but does things that drive her parents (especially my Daughter) up a wall (much to my delight..payback is a mutha-clucker). Emma tries to get-over on them but not me...been there, caught that, many times. She put a pic on FB and my alarm went off when I noticed she had tweezed her brows...poorly, when she just has to ask me to wax them, when needed. Oh yes, all the girls at school have been getting waxed, since birth...forgot to mention that.

They will test the waters at every opportunity, be strong and just remember that someday, it will all come full-circle and bite them in their asses.

Love & Hugs,

The Mommy Mambo said...

Not looking forward to that episode in my life, to perfect my back hand first! :)

Anonymous said...

Oh girl, Im scared for you! lol

My 10 yr old keeps saying hes not a kid anymore - he's a "tween", I tell him to shut his dirty little mouth!

Liz said...

I'm NOT looking forward to the teen years, especially with 2 girls! You've given me a lot to think about. :)

Ashley said...

Oh boy my kids are still tiny and I already am nervous of the teen years! xo

Jessica said...

I have one in the teen years now and I can't say it is a lot of fun. Especially since she is a girl. Those hormones are the worst!

IncidentalDomestic said...

You guys are scaring me. My kids are still young, (10, 5, 1). Don't know if I should have a supply of Prozac handy or what!! LOL!!!

-Jennifer P.