Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Help Wanted

Job description and requirements

Looking for a self-motivated individual willing to put in long hours on the job. You will be required to undergo interrupted sleep while still rising early to guarantee that daily operations start on time and run smoothly. Applicants must be able to multitask in a way that is both efficient and effective while maintaining a positive, upbeat attitude and demeanor. Crankiness will not be tolerated and suggestions regarding procedures is highly frowned upon. There will be days with little or no breaks and you must be willing to complete assigned tasks without expectation of gratitude or acknowledgement. Daily responsibilities include, but are not limited to, preparing, serving and cleaning up after three balanced meals and two snacks; pick up, organize, and put away scattered toys throughout the "workplace"- occasionally, some rooms will need to be cleaned more than once; disinfect all surfaces and the floor in the bathroom; laundry will need to be sorted, washed, dried, folded and put away in designated locations. Applicant will also be required to taxi employer and his subordinates to and from their scheduled appointments which occur daily. Some appointments may overlap, so an ability to be two places at once would be helpful. Attention to detail is a must. It disrupts the schedule if required items, apparel, or gear are forgotten or lost in transit. Please try to avoid this at all costs. All of these daily tasks must be completed while also maintaining grocery supply, pet care, and possible, yet unavoidable, disciplinary opportunities involving those in your care. The willingness to perform these tasks-and any additional duties assigned by employer-without expectation of payment is strongly encouraged. Interested applicants can apply under the name of : MOM.

3 comments:

JDaniel4's Mom said...

I don't think I have mastered these yet. In fact I may need to relearn some of the skills. Stopping from SITS!

Vic said...

I qualify. Since I'm crazy and all- I can multi-task, whizz around doing all things mentioned while wiping ass, cleaning up puke and giving them a bath for the tenth time....it's called Super Mom...No task is ever impossible.

Your a great writer!:) love it! Thanks for stopping by and your honesty. i added you to the list. have a nice night!:)

Tiffany said...

This job sound horrible but I'm the crazy type of woman that actually loves the position, at least on most days!! Thank you for becoming one of my followers, I am here following you back =) I hope you will stop by my page tomorrow to join in my very 1st blog hope called Weird Me Wednesday.
http://shhhhhjustbetweenume.blogspot.com