Thursday, September 16, 2010

Things I know for sure.

* The grass is green (in my neighbor's yard, not mine, because he has automatic sprinklers), the sky is blue (except when it's storming becasue then it's gray), and after nursing 4 babies, my boobs aren't where they used to be!

* The moon controls the tide, the sun always rise and sets (some think this has something to do with them), and I am hairy-er since having kids!

* There are 24 hours in a day (except when you travel with 4 kids to Disney World, and then there are waaaay more), 1 + 1 =2, and the Volleyball team is going to win the state championship (what can I say, I sleep with the head coach??!!)

* Boys have a penis, girls have a vagina (or a weenie whacker and yanna benieni in my house), and no, my hubby will not make the bed (even if he WAS the last one awake) or put his cereal bowl into the dishwasher.

* That magic cream WON'T make me look younger, that expensive eyeliner IS going to smudge, and that outfit DOES make my butt look big.

* The toddler put my toothbrush in the toilet, he sucked on my kabuki makeup brush, and he is playing with my tampons right now (this disturbs his father).

* The carpet needs replaced, the furniture has been peed on, and when you put the hot saucepan on the countertop, it WILL leave a black burned spot.

* My son WILL forget all of his gear for the soccer game (mom will grab it), he WILL leave his water bottle on the sideline after the game (mom will grab it), and he WILL always look for me in the crowd when he scores a goal.

* I will cry on the first day of school (at each drop off), we will lose multiple gloves (not the pair, only one from each set) throughout the school year, and we will have to do at least one last minute project.

* Motherhood is my purpose, my mom WAS right about everything, and I serve an awesome God.

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